Darling, this is my first post for you. You are so sweet, loveliness beyond all I have ever imagined. You deserve someone better. But as you are willing to give yourself whole-heartedly to me, I'll strive to be the better man that you deserve. Love you so much.

Life is more monotonous now. School and exercise, flap it around and it's the same. Exercising like my full time job now, cos I do it everyday, sometimes twice a day. The reason is simple; I'll shower every morning before I go to school. So I might as well sweat it out first before I hit the water.

I figured I have grown out of my ex relationship already. It's pretty stupid, now that I think of it.

Believes that:

True love exist. It's the one that sees the creation of the earth and sacrifices itself on the cross.

One is truly happy if he/she is happy when he/she is alone.

Training for a marathon is best way to lose weight.

Sleeping too much makes you tired.

Freshman year is carefree and careless. Parties and clubbing add spice to life. CAP is not much of a concern.

From the second year on in the university, parties and clubbing pulls your CAP down and sticks out like a sore thumb.

Despite the change, uni life is still pretty fun and enjoyable.

Tanning at the SRC swimming pool at noon time is really peaceful and relaxing.

Noon is the best time to use the school gym.

I just came back from NUS freshman orietation camp. 2 days before the camp during foundation class, the lesson was on letting go and letting God, and I was asked to pray to let go and let God. I didn't know what to pray. I was kinda confused. There were alot of things in my mind. So I prayed to God that "God I dun know what to say. I know that I'm holding on to alot of things. God you just teach me to let go."

He answered my prayer indeed. I was taught a lesson of self-denial. A really good lesson. When man look upon himself as the biggest, everything else become insignficant. And when man look upon himself with utmost value, he will be an unhappy man. How to be truely happy is the question. The answer is to live out of your own skin...

Tooth, why are u called wisdom?
Tooth, how are u wise?
Man, how do u gain wisdom?
Man, why are u wise?
Tooth, now I know why u are called wisdom tooth, for you make me wise.
For wisdom is gained thru pain

There was a child, who was abandon by his parents since birth. A poor man picked him up and becaused he have adopted this child, he laboured hard to provide for him. As time passed, he became successful, got married and have children of his own. This child was provided for and received education. In his heart, he thought that he wasn't part of the family and everything that is his foster father's isn't his. So he though that he want to work hard, have his own business and return all that his foster father has given him back and to prove to his step brothers and sisters that he is able. So when he reacted a mature age, he moved out to live alone, worked and labour hard to support himself and saved enough to began his business. But as he began his venture, he was hitted by an economic crsis and his business crumbled. He was declared bankrupted and he had no where to live except for the streets. At this moment, his foster father came to him, and wanted to provide for him again. He refused. His foster father went to him time and time again, to plead with him to return to the care of him. But he refused all the same.

And finally, he asked his foster father "why don't you give up? I'm not your own."

Then his father answer " I remember the day I took you into my arms. Not only did I brought you into my arms, but I have brought you into my heart as well. For on that day, I made a vote, that if today it is appointed that I shall see you, then I shall take you in, and forever call you my own, till I can no longer see you with my eyes, hear you with my ears and feel you with my touch. You are to me, my very own."

At last the child cried from the bottom of his heart and for the first time he felt that he has a father. And to the man, for the first time in his life, he heard from the child who has always been a son to him called him father. Because the child understood that it doesn't matter if they are biological or not. What matters is that there is someome who has decided to become his father, and him his son.

I have known no love in my course of life.
It is to me like, a being to an object.
Though I know it in the mind, and heard of live in it's highest form,
I have never see through my own flesh.
Why do we love? What is the reason?
How can I reply? How difficult it is to respond to what I know not.
But even though I understand not, I know I have to try,
to love Him in His ways, for He love me first.

Proverbs 16:9
A man's heart deviseth his way: but the LORD directeth his steps. (KJV)
In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps. (NIV)
We plan the way we want to live, but only God makes us able to live it. (The Message)

It's interesting how the different versions of the bible tells us sightly different messages.

In the KJV version of Proverbs 16:9 above, it says that we plan where we wanna go, but God tells us where we should go.

In the NIV version, it says we plan out direction in life, but God decides how we should live.

In The Message, it says we may plan how we wanna live, but if God doesn't allow, we can't live it.

All this, is kinda comforting. We should still plan what we are to do, but God will lead us to his perfect plan.

I still dunnoe what I'm gonna do...